2016 Reflections…What Now???

January 19, 2017 10:12am

As 2016 came to a close, I felt compelled to blog, but didn’t really feel like it as I brought in the New Year 2 days after chemo treatment. As I recovered, I had many thoughts of what to do next, what to write, how to reflect, New Year Resolutions, Goals, Vision Boards, etc. But I just couldn’t muster up the stamina to do it. I even participated in a webinar about creating goals that are measurable and can actually be accomplished within reason and not just ceremonially.  I looked back at 2016 with a questionable eye as the last two months was devastating with this diagnosis, a tremendous amount of unexpected new debt and a new way of living. Well, I don’t live in regret or in the past so I had to ask myself “What now?”.

As I reflect on 2016, I remember beginning the year with my husband and son, crab legs and shrimp, football and the apple and peach drop (Born in New York, live in Georgia!)  I remember 2016 as a year of risks, career and personal growth and ambition. I committed myself to my community, extended my time to helping others and became a better wife and mother.  When CANcer came into our lives, I gave myself a death sentence. The doctors didn’t tell me this, my mind did! I stopped living for a day… what now?

A few days after my diagnosis, as a family, we made a decision.  Think positive, relax and rest, rely on family and friends to help. When I finally let go and let GOD and did that, I felt so much better. Prayers and warm wishes kept me hopeful and I felt alive again.  So, the question “…what now?” as I entered 2017, was more about how to keep my life and our life going and not so much what do I do because I have CANcer.

I continue to teach my little cherubs and take time when I need. I schedule community service around treatment and vulnerability. I love on my husband and son as much as possible and ensure my son continues to do what he enjoys. It’s been working great!

Fast forward to today, February 10, 2017!!!! Yes, it still took me a minute to post, but it’s my blog and it’s ok… TeeHee😉I want this to be an encouraging, inspirational, positive exchange but I have to be honest as well. Sometimes the side effects, fatigue, taste buds that don’t taste, peripheral neuropathy, and catching a simple cold that sends you to urgent care for another upfront bill ($110) just doesn’t make you feel “pink”! However, I’m the type to soldier on and find the good in it all. I learned I really have to be mindful of my environment, what I touch, hands I shake, what and when to sanitize and how often! I also learned that if my Doctor happens to open at 11:00am on that particular day, a couple of hours for a simple copay will be just fine!!!

So a few nuggets…. I was watching the National College Football Championship game and ESPN always does a great job of highlighting the stories behind the athletes. Well, Dashaun Watson, winning quarterback for Clemson University, has a mom who had tongue CANcer and has been CANcer free for one year. She is a single mom who did everything she could to make sure her son got to college and stayed focused to fulfill HIS dream. He talked about his mom’s strength and how she always encouraged him to be strong and make her proud. “Her strength in all that she was going through made me stronger!” As I make my reflections, I keep them in mind. When I complain about my taste buds, I keep Dashaun’s mom on my heart as that dear woman has tongue CANcer and
had part of her tongue removed! I can’t complain!

My CANcer Wisdom to you: Remember to stay positive. There is someone out there who is going through far worse, believe it or not. Also don’t think of your treatments as adding years to your life, you go ahead and add LIFE to your years. Have fun, live, laugh, do something adventurous, different, exciting and new!
Be Blessed!