I Don’t Have a Cape or a Halo

The third day after treatment is a bear! Fatigue sets in, bone pain, and those taste buds begin their decline. This is always the day I question whether I will get through this. It’s only a moment though, because my faith carries me through! I never really question God, just have questions. I sit still and wait on him and he simply allows me to breathe, feel and even question. That’s my answer. As long as I’m able, I continue to be.

There are times I feel like a Superhero. Taking care of my family, working, volunteering, telling others about my journey.  Then there are times where I feel completely vulnerable, silent in my fight, in denial, and even weak.  Being a Superhero takes a lot of responsibility and strength…. why me? I don’t have a cape or a halo! I’m not a Superhero, a divine being. I’m just me… a wife, mom, daughter, sister, aunt, friend, colleague. But you know, everyone has their inner Superhero. Whatever makes you fight, think positive, whatever motivates you to be and do your best. Everything in you that makes you face challenges and overcome obstacles…all encompasses your cape and halo. It’s your purpose, your why, your reason!

Fighting breast cancer is like riding a roller coaster that has immeasurable dips and valleys, turns and hills that sometimes catches you off guard and sometimes stares you right in the face! Me, I choose to ride my coaster with my eyes wide open! I want to see where I’m going, no surprises. Some of the hills make me scream and others make me cry. I ride with my husband and son, family and friends and keep my GOD very close for the dips and valleys. Some say, “You’re so strong, courageous…” My response, “I don’t have a cape or a halo!” I’m not strong or courageous. I have a purpose. God has a purpose for my life and if it’s through this platform called breast CANcer, then so be it. I don’t like to look at myself as being extraordinary due to a circumstance. There are many people that have circumstances and that would make me seem that my circumstance is more than another. Extraordinary people are made out of how they live through their purpose.
My CANcer Wisdom to you: Ask God what your purpose is and live in that. Don’t rely on that cape or halo others bestow on you. You are as strong and as courageous as needed to face any circumstance you have. You were chosen so use the platform wisely.